Sometimes I have these super ballsy moments where I see a cute guy and give them my number. One night I went out on a whim and gave a guy my number. He was sweet, funny and had an accent from Louisiana. So, I will call him Louisiana. We ended up going out to lunch the very next day.
Our first date was great. I felt very comfortable talking to him and being with him. We hung out a few times but I noticed that he was always negative about things and mean to other people. He was never negative or mean towards me. Louisiana came over for dinner one night and things got hot. Very hot. But hot doesn’t always mean good, so I learned that night.
A few days later Louisiana drunk dialed me asking to come pick him up from a bar. I was beyond annoyed that he wouldn’t accept no for an answer. I ended up picking him up and letting him stay the night at my house. I set a few ground rules for him staying the night. These were my rules (mostly because of my annoyance): do not breath on me, do not touch me, no cuddling, no snoring and no sex! I listed each rule and then rolled over. Louisiana finally passed out after an hour of drunk mumbling. I pretended to be asleep. Then, the snoring began. I tried waking him up multiple times. Finally, I got up and went and slept in my spare room. The next morning, I had to get ready for work and then drive him back to his hotel.
I ended up “ghosting” Louisiana after that night. He reached out to me twice and I felt awful about leaving him hanging. Finally, I texted him and told him where I was that moment in my life and why it wouldn’t work out between us. I decided to meet Louisiana for dinner one night and I was very honest with him. We were talking about the reason why I began going to church and he said he understood where I was coming from. I told him that maybe these were the reasons he was so negative and mean to other people. We had a very deep conversation that night. Louisiana still tried to be more than friends with me but I was not having it. He moved back home soon after.
Occasionally I would hear from him and how I changed his life. I found out that he began going to church and was no longer negative and mean to other people. He said I helped him realize what he needed to fix in his life and how to become a better person. Louisiana ended up sending me a handwritten card and very thoughtful gift for Christmas that year. He is also still convinced that I am the love of his life and he’s going to marry me one day.
Although I enjoyed Louisiana’s company, I didn’t feel the “click.” I was instantly annoyed with him in less than a week. Louisiana will still randomly text me to see if I’ve met anyone and if he still has a chance. Each time I’m just as honest with him as I have been in the past. Meeting Louisiana taught me that you need to be honest. It also made me feel good, knowing I helped him become a better person. I pray that Louisiana finds that perfect person that he’s searching for and will remain this awesome person he has become. Also, I learned that ghosting people is wrong and its always better to be upfront and honest with everyone.